Life can feel like a race some days—work, family, errands, messages to reply to, laundry piles that multiply when you blink. In the rush of all this, self care can quietly slide to the bottom of the list. And yet, self care is the foundation that helps you carry everything else. If you’re feeling stretched thin, know this: you are not alone, and you are absolutely allowed to put yourself first sometimes.
I speak from experience. Self care goes to the bottom of the pile when I'm depressed and when I'm overwhelmed. Since the arrival of our little one, and life's to-do list stepping up a gear, I've become even less of a priority for myself. But the truth is, we wouldn't be able to do anything if we weren't up to it. So every time we skip looking after ourselves to keep up with everything else, its detrimental to our capacity to do what we need to do, and we're telling ourselves we're not worth looking after when we really, truly are. Self care is essential.
So how do you prioritise self care when your to-do list is already overflowing? The key is making it small, intentional, and non-negotiable.
1. Start with what actually makes you feel good
Self care doesn’t have to be candles and bubble baths (although those are lovely too). It might be a quiet walk, a few pages of a book, putting your phone away for an hour, or cooking something nourishing. Think about what makes you feel like yourself again. Your self care doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s.
Psychologist Dr. Kristen Neff, who specialises in self-compassion, reminds us that self care is “not self-indulgence, it’s self-preservation.” When you refill your cup, you have more to give—not just to others, but to your own hopes and goals.
2. Schedule it like it matters (because it does)
When you book meetings, you show up. Treat self care the same way. Try setting aside 10 minutes in the morning for deep breaths and stretching, or reserve one lunch break a week for a solo coffee or sketching session. By putting it in your calendar, you're giving yourself permission to stop and care.
Time blocking and habit-stacking can help too. For example, pair five minutes of journaling with your morning tea. These little rituals build powerful routines.
3. Say no (so you can say yes to yourself)
It’s tempting to say yes to everything—especially when you care about the people around you. But constantly showing up for others without showing up for yourself leads to burnout. If you feel overwhelmed, practise the gentle art of saying no.
When you say no to something, you’re saying yes to space. Space to rest, reset, or do something that restores you. Boundaries are a form of self care in themselves. And anyone in your circle who is worth their salt will understand that and let you take that time.
4. Check in with your energy
Not every day will offer the same time or mental space. That’s okay. Tune in to what you need: Do you feel frazzled? Move slowly. Feel low? Go outside or call someone kind. Feeling flat? Make something with your hands.
Self care is responsive. It’s not a to-do list—it's a conversation with yourself. And it's hearing when you need a minute and giving yourself that minute. You know why? Because you deserve it, and you can look after everyone better when you look after yourself. Plus, you'll be a lot happier for it too.
5. Remember: You’re allowed
You don’t need to earn rest. You don’t need to prove you're worthy of looking after yourself. Life will always be busy—but you are not a machine. You're a human being, and your well-being matters.
So take a moment today, however small, just for you. Your future self will thank you—and the world gets the best of you when you’ve taken care of yourself first.
Prioritise Your Self Care in a Busy Life - You Deserve It
This post is a collaborative effort between AI and myself in order to work a little bit faster.
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